One Liners and Other Inappropriate Crap

I am feeling nice tonight and so that you will all be amused for a few weeks I have compiled a nice list of various one-liners and other amusing little tidbits for your enjoyment. I have probably taken most of these out of context, it is more amusing that way. Complain and I will beat you with a stiletto heel - you have been warned.


Tiffers says:
I bought myself a chocolate bar in the shape of a man
Bizzler says:
LMAO
Nicmouse says:
lol
Bizzler says:
I bought pickles. Which is almost the same thing.


Crutchturtle says:
it's like when you convince kids to smoke crack for the first time, you have to let them know how awesome it will be


Tiffers says:
I would rather have a girl than a boy
Nicmouse says:
me too
Bizzler says:
I'd rather have a baby dinosaur

Bizzler says:
I want a dinosaur and I want to name him....
Bizzler says:
Oh man, Billy and Jesus could be friends

Crutchturtle says:
Here comesNairelbircs, here comes Nairelbircs, Hide your eyes in fear! She's gotthe toys for the girls and boys Who've been oh so bad this year! Lumpsof coal, here comes the Mole With canons she will fight So jump in bedand cover your head 'Cause Nairelbircs comes tonight!

Tiffers says:
We wish youwere feeling better;
We wish you weren't hacking up lungs;
We wish you weren't loaded up on cough syrup and we miss our Bizzy.
Healing thoughts we bring to you and your burning throat;
Hopeful thoughts that someday my diseased wifey will return.
Oh, bring us back a crazy Bizzy;
Oh, bring us our sarcastic Scribbles;
Oh, bring us a healthy Raina and leave the dirty tissues at home.
Refrain
We won't go until we get her;
We won't go until she's well;
We won't go until her flu is gone,
so bring us our Bizzlebutt:
Refrain
We wish you were feeling better;
We wish you weren't contagious;
We wish you weren't so sick and playing with us!

Nicmouse says:
so what does he give her?
Bizzler says:
herpes
Tiffers says:
LMAO
Nimouse says:
nice reentrance.
Bizzler says:
Came back just in time

(Two seconds later)

Crutchurtle says:
you're trying to impress her? with the diamonds?
Nicmouse says:
nope
Bizzler says:
Get her two tickets to the gun show
Nicmouse says:
Just get her a good present
Bizzler says:
ROFL*is done now*
Nicmouse says:
bizz, your suggesting privileges are revoked.

Tiffers says:
Aw! The girl who ain't got no legs is finally walking again - good for her!

Bizzler says:
You know what else is the gift that keeps on giving?
Bizzler says:
herpes

Bizzler says:
Okay,so I was in the kitchen with my brother and he was leaving to go to a party and he stopped to try and fix his jacket zipper so I took alemon off the counter and slipped it into his jacket pocket. He TOTALLY didnt notice and he drove away with it like that. ROFL He's gonna get to his party and put his hand in there, pull out the lemonand look like a nutcase.
Tiffers says:
you are such a dork

Bizzler says:
Drink water
Bizzler says:
That's the advice that works with almost every ailment
Bizzler says:
*has no idea if it will help*
Tiffers says:
hahaha
Tiffers says:
did that help with your herpes?
Bizzler says:
No, but oddly enough your crabs medication did. I found it in our medicine cabinet. XD

Tiffers says:
you'll have to iron out those details yourself
Bizzler says:
Ironing out the parachute is a BITCH I'll tell you that much.
Bizzler says:
ROFL I seriously dont understand why you guys talk to me.

Bizzy says:
BUT I've never crashed into anything. Or gotten a ticket.
Bizzy says:
*just jinxed herself*
Bizzy says:
My brother has gotten more than he can count
Bizzy says:
So like, 5
Tiffers says:
LMAO
Tiffers says:
ZING!
Bizzler says:
Ahhh, I crack myself up

Tiffers says:
I want to throw an orange at someone's head, just to see if it breaks openand squirts orange juice at everyone

The Nun says:
(Bizz, explosive diarrhea wasn't enough at 10 vials abou, you had to add the measles at 12?! Mara just had brain fever, Irested for one day and she's all better! Nic: a snake bite, threevials. Suck it up, sleeze bag!)

I will post some more later on this week when I am feeling less tired - don't you worry - there is always lots of crazy comments to repeat.